Tongue firmly in cheek, here is our prediction for the SIGGRAPH 2009 papers.
Please add as you see fit!
- HDRIBLSHGPGPUBSSRDFing stuff
- Really Fucking Slow Noise Amplification
- Cutting and Pasting SIGGRAPH Papers
- Generalized Point Set Surfaces: Segment Set Surfaces
- Simulating Every Single Thing in the World in Real Time (Reduced Ten Degree of Freedom Model)
- Cool Things To Do With Two Billion Cameras
- Oops, There's Another Bug In Noise
- Fluid Animation Via Complicated Numerical Analysis Buzzwords
- A Simple, Chromatic-Voronoi-GPU/PPU-OBBTree-PointBased-SemiStochastic-QuasiRigid-BSP-JIT-PDQ Culling Strategy for Real Time Collisions
- Metropolis Sampling and Photon Mapping for Globally Illuminated Jello, on the GPU
- Lots and Lots of Stuff Falling on Top of Other Stuff
- Generalized Segment Set Surfaces: Triangle Set Surfaces
- Capturing Real World Illumination, Exhaustively
- Real-Time Rendering of Ultra Low Dynamic Range Scenes
- PASTA: Peculiar AcronymS are Terribly Amusing
- Global Illumination for Fun and Profit
- Squishing, Smashing, Burning, Melting, and Vaporizing the Stanford Bunny
- Funniest Home Videos of People in Mocap Suits
- Photorealistic Spaghetti
- Photorealism Must Die!
- Non-Photorealistic Spaghetti
- A Truly Marvelous Proof of an Optimal Rendering Algorithm (which these 8 pages are too narrow to contain)
- Fourier Everything
- Poisson Everything else
- Chocolate BIFF: The Inside Joke That Would Not Die
- Generalized Triangle Set Surfaces: Surface Set Surfaces
- Simulation of Water in Some Kind of Invisible Tub
- Photorealism Must Die: Introducing Microsoft Realism (TM) v1.0
- As-Rigid-As-Possible PowerPoint Transitions
- That Same Girl, Hanging From a Play Structure, Again
- Realistic Simulation of Another Body Part We Hadn't Thought of 'Til Now
- Ellipsoidal Stickman Learns a New Trick
- Advanced Shutter Fluttering of the Fluttered-Shutter for Special Shutter Flutter Effects
- TAMPONS: Tracking And Manipulating Point sets ON Surfaces