Date: Fri, 11 Jun 2004 13:18:27 -0700 (PDT)

From: David Sprague <dsprague@cs.ubc.ca>

To: grads-conf@cs.ubc.ca

Subject: Beer, art and the art of beer..

 

Well looking around the department today, it seems like most people are

taking today easy.  Maybe its the weather.  Maybe its the time of the

term.  Well if people are not being overly productive then coming out

to Koerner's for a pint or two  isn't really going to hinder your

productivity.  If you have been effective today, then you will need a

break.  Yes there is no reason why not to come out to Koerner's *  We will

be meeting at the front of CICSR (probably inside) at 5:00pm and then head

on down to the golden halls of fine beer and finer service. To a place

where everyone knows your name. **

 

* Unless you do not drink alcohol or you don't feel like socializing,

or you don't have any money, or you don't want to drink anything tonight,

or it's against your religion, or you have prior engagements, etc.  Geez I

am surprised so many people show up.

 

** unless they don't.

 

As promised, I wanted to contimplate the purpose and potential uses for

the Atrium sculpture that was taken down last week.  I still don't know

what it is supposed to represent (although I am pretty sure it was

explained to me at one time) so Vance and myself came up with some more

concrete utilities for it.  Why just put it outside when it can be put to

use?

 

TOP TEN USES FOR THE ATRIUM SCUPTURE

 

A) USES FOR THE WHOLE STRUCTURE

------------------------------------------------------

10) Leave the tarp on it and bring an extension cord to it and you

have extra office space.

 

9) Terrific TA awards for good TAs. Solitary Sculpture Confinement

sentences for crappy TAs.

 

8) The worst rock climbing structure ever.

 

7)  Grad school entrance requirement: Figure out how to build it or you

don't get in.

 

6) Find out what modifications are necessary to make it an interesting

item for the 'Does it explode?' game.

(Vance)

 

5) Yet another thing for the skateboarders in front of the building to

jump off of.

 

4) Rename it To commemorate the Dot Com Crash: "The Modern Tech Jobs

Tumbleweed".

 

3) Tie to car bumpers with a long rope.  Sit back.  Laugh.

 

2) Turn it into the best Beer Czar Mug ever!

(Vance)

 

1) The Durocher Injury Prevention Sculpture (D.I.P.S.): Stick him in it

until the wedding to ensure groom safety.

 

0)  Fill it full of cs pamphlets to make it the Frequent Use Computational

Knowledge & Education Device (F.U......never mind).

 

-1) Three words: Newfie Rubix Cube

 

-2) An extra bike rack

 

-3) A very cheap "COMPUTER Science World".

 

-4)  Indianna Jones trap the cofee maker.  Take the last cup of coffee,

even if you replace it with a pot of water, and 300 pounds of sculpture is

rolling your way.

 

B) USES FOR THE INDIVIDUAL POLES

----------------------------------------------------------

 

5) Build a maze.  See if a $3 hamster can solve it before a $10,000

robot

(Vance).

 

4) Mandatory obstacle course for September's newbies.  I want them in

shape, dammit!

(Vance)

 

3) Very large periscope.  Aimed at the north side of campus.  So CS

people can pass through the lobby and see non-computer scientists for

a change

(Vance).

 

2) Close off one end, put a straw in the side and you got one big

Bon....water pipe.

 

1) "Luke, I am your father!"

"Do, that's not true. That's impossible!!"

 

0) Large metal rods.  Distribute, place down pants.  Head to Koerner's.

'Nuff said. (Vance)